Monday, 16 November 2015

7 Tips for getting the best out of your FEMALE BOSS especially for men

1) Stop seeing her as female. See her as a human being who has achieved enough to earn the right to be your boss. If that thought governs your thoughts about her then it will flow through your actions and will most likely, seamlessly come through as RESPECT. Focus on her achievements as opposed to her gender.
2) Never EVER say things like..."I have never worked with a woman before" or "I have never reported to a woman before" or "My friends said working with a woman is tough"...bla bla bla,... please refer to number one.
3) Don't take her generosity, kindness or 'motherly' traits for granted. Most female  bosses show care, its almost second nature..."Have you eaten?" , How are you going home? etc...They 'look at your face' as we say in Nigeria but don't let them feel for a second that you are taking advantage of their kindness or taking them for granted. That lady gonna turn cold, stingy and mean so fast you will be left confused and unable to break down the walls. Resist having a sense of entitlement. Its not her job to take care of you. That's what your salary is for. So if she ever extends an act of kindness to you, understand its a privilege not a right.
4) Do not assume that it is OK to refer to her as Madam. Especially if she falls into any of these categories: 'Under 40', 'Single' or 'Plus sized'. Tread carefully on how to address her. Any title she doesn't like, DROP IT! FAST! Till you find what works. If you are in an office environment where people are called by their first names then please call her just that. You don't need to remind her she looks like a MADAM. Experiment until you find what works. Try "Ma"!, Try addressing her without any titles at all but be polite...use "Excuse me" or "please" to get her attention then make your request or speak on. You may coin a way of saying her name without making her feel old but still showing Ma'am Seki  or Lady Seki...but just find what works well with her or else one day you will call her that name and she will snap your head off  with her words then you will be wondering what you said wrong. My dear your cup has run over.  
5) DO not feel the need to compliment her on her looks especially if she is in business mode. There are very few serious minded boss ladies who care for your compliments. Its fine for them to see it in your eyes that you appreciate what you see but just leave it at that. No need to patronize. Except you have discovered that is her switch then in that case you can use it. However, most female bosses will switch off and get cold cos you are about to cross the line of  number one above. Would you start telling your male boss in a business situation...Wow sir this your shoe today...its so look hot...bla bla bla??? Think about it.
6) When she is upset, You need to LISTEN to what she is saying or complaining about and not read her with any stereotype assumptions. None of that hormone, monthly cycle, quarrel with husband, how are the children, husband is hard to find excuses. She is upset because of what she is saying, no more no less. Fix it as instructed. That's respect. Take her seriously or else she gonna push you off the cliff one day and you will be wondering what you did to deserve that.
7) When you want to ask her for a favour, go straight to the point. When you want to explain something to her, go straight to the point. She is female, not a child, not a weakling and definitely not  stupid. That's why she is the boss and  you are NOT yet...So RECOGNIZE or else she will make you recognize and oh so painfully you will.
If I have helped, or you would like to share...drop a line in the comment section. Thanks for reading.

7 Tips for enjoying your stay in the 'Average' Nigerian Hotel

So yes I have slept in more than a few hotels across this country called Nigeria....due to the nature of my job oh...not 'short time tinzzz'...LoL!!

Ok seriously from Lagos '5Star' to Kano '1Star' I have laid my head on their pillows and I am currently blogging from one. Don't ask me too many questions, just take it as I have told you. So here we go...7 tips I have learnt that will help you enjoy your stay in an average Nigerian Hotel. #10YearsExperience speaking.
1) Bring your own air/room freshener/fragrance with you. For some reason some of  these hotels smell stale and that smell just hangs in the air. You don't want to open the windows and allow the unfamiliar mosquitoes in right? So carry thine own fragrance along. Please add insecticide to air freshener.
2) Bring your own  bed sheet!..Yes Really ...Is there any need to discuss why? Just lay yours on theirs and it will be fine...smells like home, feels like home and of course SAFE like home.
3) I just feel the need to say this "ESPECIALLY FOR MEN"!!!... Bring your own towel, soap, toothbrush and yes even  underwear...Lol... WHY anybody would plan to use the hotel's towel is a wonder to me. There are only two hotels in Nigeria worth risking your skin for...OK maybe three. 
Two are in Lagos; in VI...and the other one is in Abuja...OK there are maybe one or two others in Abuja that just might pass the towel test but outside these my brother, my sister..say No!!!. Air dry or use tissue paper to wipe your skin if you have to but just say no to those towels.
It is not everything you see that is a towel for the body... some were used on the floor by other guests  ...have I shocked you?? Good! Never ever go again without your own towel. Then why would you want to use that their soap?? That soap??...Really?...Don't get me started on the tiny toothpaste and toothbrush that cant help even a baby not to mention a grown up Man or woman....Carry your own please.
4) Don't allow them clean your room when you are not there. So tidy up a bit after yourself and give instructions that NOBODY should enter your room to clean until you are there. Go with your key. If they have a 'Do Not Disturb' Sign,  lucky you...use it. This prevents stealing and searching your stuff and of course them noticing you brought your own bed sheet or them throwing away your air freshener in anger flavored with hatred ...Lol.
Yes I know they have a spare key but once you leave instructions and anything gets missing they become liable.
5) Sneak in some dry snacks! Yes I said it...Bring your own snacks....Hotel owners sue me!...Ain't nobody got time to be eating that your regular food at upper 4 digit prices 3 to 5 times a day..Soooo my people, breakfast will most likely be complimentary except the hotel is realllllyyyy low! (One time I stayed at this one where they don't cook, so you send the receptionist/porter/laundryman/gateman/ car wash personnel/bar tender to  go buy food while you hold the place down till his Lagos oh not Kano. Kano was where they gave me green rice with scrambled boiled egg (I ordered fried rice)...but that's story for another day. Please snacks need to be dry so you don't put them in the fridge and hotel management catches you for sneaking food in or angry housekeeper eats it and dares you to complain. Take NOTE...Emphasis on DRY!!!
6) If you are staying in a hotel in the western part of Nigeria (Akure, Abeokuta, Ilorin and such)..My people BRING your own tissue ......I cant go into details here but your bum deserves better than tough, pepperish something like dry leaf.... Trust me. Lol
7) Last for now  but definitely not the least, take enough warm clothing so you don't get sick. Some hotels actually have the AC facing the bed directly and that duvet 'wannabe' cant help you.
These tips are for the 'AVERAGE' Nigerian hotel...I'll be back soon with my tips for rocking the '5 Star Hotels' like a BOSS!
They are few but they are here and they are worth the experience compared to some of the average ones. It will be a pleasure to share my experiences with you.  So enjoy your stay and leave a comment here if you have your own tip or you want to share an experience or if  these tips have helped you. Thanks for reading.

Tuesday, 10 November 2015


As copied verbatim from the wall of a 'BIAFRAN'
I have noticed some miscommunication and misperceptions about what the Biafra movement is about. Here are 9 key facts about the NEW BIAFRA that everyone should know.
(1) Biafran agitation has nothing to do with hydrocarbon crude oil deposits in Niger Delta. Imo, Abia, Anambra are currently oil producing states in Nigeria, with huge natural gas reserves not forgetting the enormous untapped coal deposits in Enugu.
(2) Biafra is not land-locked. It has numerous access to the sea, including through the River Niger.
(3) Biafra entire population is about 35 million people which is greater than the population many advanced countries in Western Europe, including Switzerland, Luxembourg, Belgium, Holland, Austria….etc
(4) Biafra does not or in any form signify war, violence, armed struggle or any sort of physical confrontation. BIAFRA IS NOT WAR! It simply means political, economic and socio-cultural freedom from a feudalist State ruled by terrorists and Jihadists.
(5) Biafra is not a call for massive exodus to Igbo land. Put differently, every Igbo or Biafran must not live in Biafra land. Those who wish could still maintain their residency wherever they are as well as own properties anywhere in the world, including Lagos, Abuja, Kaduna, Kano, Abeokuta…etc.
(6) Independent and sovereign Biafra will never translate to loss or forfeiture of landed properties of her citizens in Lagos, Abuja or anywhere in Nigeria. There are many domestic and international treaties, conventions and laws that protects Assets of non-citizens everywhere in the World, that will apply appropriately.
(7) The NEW BIAFRA shall be a coalition of desirous and willing ethnic nationalities in defunct Eastern Nigeria and would never be a forceful annexation of any unwilling ethnic nationality within its current geo-political definition. Ijaws, Ogonis, Ibibio, Anangs, Efiks, Ogojas, and host of other ethnic minorities shall possess the privilege to decide whether to tango politically with their Igbo brethren or go their own separate ways or remain part of current structural deficient Nigeria.
(8) Biafra is a train of peace and liberty. A desire for liberation from institutionalised stumbling blocks like quota system and federal character principles in Nigeria’s quasi-unitary society. It is a movement against internal colonialism, tribal gang-ups, economic marginalisation and political subjugation of Igbo and ethnic minority neighbours.
(9) It has nothing to do with hate, bigotry or ethnic chauvinism. Just a desire to live in a healthy society where your tribe, tongue, religion or creed does not define who you are or how far you would go in your career.

Monday, 9 November 2015

How a carpenter almost raped my maid in my house. Please be careful, be safe

So a carpenter came to my house last week and nearly raped my maid.

 I am just sharing this now cos I am just recovering from the shock.

He offered her the N600 which was supposed to be his fee for repairing the door handle that was coming off. Why would someone think he can get sex for 600 bucks? Why should someone come into someone's home and expect to pay for sex ? She wasn't standing on  the road...he came to her home to repair a door handle and when she refused he wanted to rape her.

He came at her from behind but mercy said no

Thank God he didn't know someone else was at home and that person intervened.

I was and I'm still in awe of what wickedness is possible in today's world.

Scary but true.

The case was reported to the police after the man was given a thorough beating by estate security but it  was later dismissed when they confirmed  there was no  penetration and the case might not thrive in court plus they couldn't hold him indefinitely in the cell.

Did I mention that the Idiot pulled off his trousers before attempting to rape the girl who was fully dressed?  #DesperateCarpenter.

I get angry, then sad, then angry, then sad...its so sad and annoying but its true and it happened in my house. Be careful who you let into your homes people...Be safe out there.

7 Health and Fitness Tips as Christmas Season Approaches

Hi there friends, I'm reminding you and  myself actually of the following health, fitness and wellness tips as the season of eating and being merry comes along.

You can print this post or save it on your phone to remind you just before you misbehave.

1) Move your body....Exercise!...Walk, run, jog, wave your hands in the air, do something, anything!!! But do it daily, do it consistently, do it committedly.. so you can get results.

2) Don't skip you don't use that as an excuse to eat an unnecessarily heavy lunch, brunch, supper and or dinner.

3) Eat what you really like or desire. Don't just settle for 'rice' because that's what's available. Save your hunger...hang in there until you are able to buy or prepare what you really desire to eat especially for lunch or dinner. Don't settle for what you don't want so you don't eat twice. You can have a food table and plan your meals in advance. This helps.. Big time!

4) When you do find what you really want to eat, don't rush it, savour it, enjoy it, relish it. live in the moment...cos it will finish!... Sadly... And if you rushed it, you will eat more than required. I am reluctant to say this but ..yeah.. manage your portions. (I can't even bring myself to say "eat small portions".. but you should *sigh*) . Good news is if you do this right, you can eat 5 times a day as opposed to 3 or 2. Good News Indeed!  So the tip here is to buy small bowls which hold your portions and save stuff you really like in them for later.

5) Eat all meals before 6PM...OK!... 7PM....ALRIGHT don't go beyond 9PM...Ok so maybe at least 3 hours before bedtime don't eat. So if you know you will sleep by 1AM does that mean ....Don't quote me please. However if the temptation is so much, just save it for breakfast the next day. There are actually no real rules to what you should have for breakfast did you know that? As far as it gives you energy and wont slow you down...EAT IT!...for breakfast I mean.

6) Leave alcohol alone! Plus anything 'smokey' is bad for your health... except grills...moderation is key even in that area...carcinogenic stuff..sad but true.

7) Find what will make you laugh and stay with it; hang around people you love and stay HAPPY. None of that holiday depression stuff that leads to 'comfort eating'. You owe yourself better than that. Focus on what went well this year. If you are alone, look for people to serve and help this season. Volunteer with a religious organization, an NGO, whatever will help you put a smile on other people's faces. There is no greater feeling in this world than being the source of someone's smile. Trust me and give it a try. 

Hope I have helped? If yes, leave a comment and share your own tips as well. Cheers!

Friday, 6 November 2015

Thought for the day

What are we waiting for?...There are things we desire to happen and they are yet to happen so we keep postponing what we would love to do because we are waiting for this THING to happen. This thing could be a job interview,  a man to propose, a business deal to click, a sick relative even or some money we are expecting. Well while waiting it's like we put our lives on hold and we are not living. I have a funny experience.... I have been keeping this outfit for a while now....waiting for 'something' where I will wear the outfit to. Yesterday I wore it  and it's going to be dry cleaned tomorrow. The world did not end. The THING I was waiting for is still yet to happen. Whether it happens or not....("oh God please let it happen") I choose to LIVE while I am waiting. You should do same. God help us all.

Wednesday, 4 November 2015

Tips for identifying your best platform for expressing your gift(s) and talent(s)

As promised, I am bringing you some quick pointers to identifying your best platform for expressing your gift and talents. 
First  I'm going to list some basic forms of expression that are even available i.e. writing, speaking, dance, Singing, recitation, drawing, crafting, acting,  designing etc..Are you getting the direction now? 
So to identify your best platform(s) for expression, here are some tips;
1)What do you find the easiest to do as  per expressing your thoughts and emotions?
2) What do people compliment you the most for when you express?
3) Have you ever been recognized or rewarded for any form  of expression?...I have been commended  and celebrated for my writing skills...believe it!
These are just pointers to your best form of expression. 
Once you have identified your perfect expression form, explore how you can grow it and take it to the next level. 
This next level  then becomes your platform for expressing your gift, talent or what you were born to do... 
Lets look at Mandy who discovered from my last article here that she was born to cook (or to make it less mysterious... her talent is cooking). And she realizes her best form of expression is writing.
Mandy can give her cooking gift a platform by 
a) Becoming a food blogger... Please note that posting on social media is a micro form of blogging...just be consistent so people can anticipate and follow you.
b) Becoming a recipe columnist in a magazine or newspaper
c) Writing a  cook book 
If Mandy discovered her best form of expression is speaking, she could give herself the platform of  Vlog/ TV/Radio show presenting on food and cooking or becoming a cooking teacher to neighborhood kids on weekends and holidays, new wives etc. 
Now don't just stop at making a list of possible platforms, I didn't write all this so you can just have new knowledge, I wrote it so that with minimal effort you can start something today that can change your life and take you closer to financial freedom.
So go create  a platform immediately by answering the following question; 
"Which one  can I start today with no money and no connections?" 
Go ahead and start IMMEDIATELY!!!! 
Watch out for my post on 'managing and maximizing your  multiple talents'.
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