Ok seriously from Lagos '5Star' to Kano '1Star' I have laid my head on their pillows and I am currently blogging from one. Don't ask me too many questions, just take it as I have told you. So here we go...7 tips I have learnt that will help you enjoy your stay in an average Nigerian Hotel. #10YearsExperience speaking.
1) Bring your own air/room freshener/fragrance with you. For some reason some of these hotels smell stale and that smell just hangs in the air. You don't want to open the windows and allow the unfamiliar mosquitoes in right? So carry thine own fragrance along. Please add insecticide to air freshener.
2) Bring your own bed sheet!..Yes Really ...Is there any need to discuss why? Just lay yours on theirs and it will be fine...smells like home, feels like home and of course SAFE like home.
3) I just feel the need to say this "ESPECIALLY FOR MEN"!!!... Bring your own towel, soap, toothbrush and yes even underwear...Lol... WHY anybody would plan to use the hotel's towel is a wonder to me. There are only two hotels in Nigeria worth risking your skin for...OK maybe three.
Two are in Lagos; in VI...and the other one is in Abuja...OK there are maybe one or two others in Abuja that just might pass the towel test but outside these my brother, my sister..say No!!!. Air dry or use tissue paper to wipe your skin if you have to but just say no to those towels.
It is not everything you see that is a towel for the body... some were used on the floor by other guests ...have I shocked you?? Good! Never ever go again without your own towel. Then why would you want to use that their soap?? That soap??...Really?...Don't get me started on the tiny toothpaste and toothbrush that cant help even a baby not to mention a grown up Man or woman....Carry your own please.
4) Don't allow them clean your room when you are not there. So tidy up a bit after yourself and give instructions that NOBODY should enter your room to clean until you are there. Go with your key. If they have a 'Do Not Disturb' Sign, lucky you...use it. This prevents stealing and searching your stuff and of course them noticing you brought your own bed sheet or them throwing away your air freshener in anger flavored with hatred ...Lol.
Yes I know they have a spare key but once you leave instructions and anything gets missing they become liable.
5) Sneak in some dry snacks! Yes I said it...Bring your own snacks....Hotel owners sue me!...Ain't nobody got time to be eating that your regular food at upper 4 digit prices 3 to 5 times a day..Soooo my people, breakfast will most likely be complimentary except the hotel is realllllyyyy low! (One time I stayed at this one where they don't cook, so you send the receptionist/porter/laundryman/gateman/ car wash personnel/bar tender to go buy food while you hold the place down till his return...in Lagos oh not Kano. Kano was where they gave me green rice with scrambled boiled egg (I ordered fried rice)...but that's story for another day. Please snacks need to be dry so you don't put them in the fridge and hotel management catches you for sneaking food in or angry housekeeper eats it and dares you to complain. Take NOTE...Emphasis on DRY!!!
6) If you are staying in a hotel in the western part of Nigeria (Akure, Abeokuta, Ilorin and such)..My people BRING your own tissue ......I cant go into details here but your bum deserves better than tough, pepperish something like dry leaf.... Trust me. Lol
7) Last for now but definitely not the least, take enough warm clothing so you don't get sick. Some hotels actually have the AC facing the bed directly and that duvet 'wannabe' cant help you.
These tips are for the 'AVERAGE' Nigerian hotel...I'll be back soon with my tips for rocking the '5 Star Hotels' like a BOSS!
They are few but they are here and they are worth the experience compared to some of the average ones. It will be a pleasure to share my experiences with you. So enjoy your stay and leave a comment here if you have your own tip or you want to share an experience or if these tips have helped you. Thanks for reading.
Thank you so much. Especially the bed sheet one. I have never really thought of that.
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